Dean Graziosi Weekly Wisdom #148 - This Negotiation Secret Gets You What You Want

Yes, once again you give great direction...Thanks Dean

Another great weekly blog. I use this all the time and it is so simple yet so important. Thanks Dean for the reminder

Thanks for the reminder. Dean. Great advice often comes from plain old common sense...not to mention those lessons we learned as kids. It isn't a conversation if two people are talking AT each other instead of listening TO each other.

Very good information. I feel all information should be on a need to know basis. Most of the time less information is best. I was driving around over the weekend within a 5 mile radius of my home and there are homes for sale,lease everywhere.

Patience move mountains.It's better to listen and absorb rather than jumping in a conversation.Some experience people will stop sharing what they know when you interrupt.Thanks Dean.

Dean and DG family,
I certainly do not have trouble conversating with people. I notice that everywhere I go I 'meet no stranger'.

The new lingo in real estate, especially real estate investing, is new to me but I did have my 1st conversation w/ a mover and it went really smooth BECAUSE I DID NOT THINK ABOUT IT! This, for me, was the key to the success. He asked questions and I did know the simple answers, but I noticed I was worried he would ask me question to a depth I could not answer. WHEW! I was glad I knew it was time to leave so he could continue his moving out. But it felt really good.
I enjoyed talking about REI.

I'd like to make a point of the quiet time that happens when no one speaks. Many try to 'fill the gap'. It really isn't necessary, because it's a thinking moment, but if nothing else, I simply find a topic whether a common ground or differences, be the flowers or shape of landscape, or the neighborhood, or even color scheme, whatever can keep the 'comfort zone'.
Many people don't mind talking about themselves, so this is easy to give them the podium and the relation between us two or more falls into place.

But yes, I am not too keen on showing the amateur side to my REI simply because it can be intimating with a stern business man. I will learn as I go and it'll keep me growing to success as I really need this to work.
Thank you for your encouragement each week. It is deeply appreciated.
Jami

You are right on Dean,I'v been talking less on the phone with the Agents and I been going through more calls. I feel I'm that much closer to my goal of finding that perfect agent.With the more calls I'v been making that why I feel >The Fear has Passed< I just haded To face Fear head on so I can get the experience and I did.
I'll be listening more and talking less.
Thanks Dean your the Best.:-:

The simplest thing to do--listen--turns out to be the most difficult to remember to do. This will be my purposeful effort all this week. Shut mouth, open ears; shut mouth, open ears....Got it!
You have perfect timing, Dean, thank you for the reminder!

A great week to you and everybody in DG!

p.s. Brody is a handsome little boy and looks
like he is sweet as an M&M.

I bought a book many yrs ago called Lifetime Conversation Guide. I got it cuz the author advertised it as a way "to Control people". Wen I recieved it I thought, wat a rip off, how can conversations control people. Most of the book is about listening and being totaly interested in what the other person is saying. The author says "The greatest compliment you can give to another person is to listen to them" makes them feel important. This book has been invaluable to me, in making friends, relationships, in business in every part of my life. My first few deals in Real Estate I was very nervous, but I did ask a few questions and the people wud just talk and talk. It took a little encouragement, I wud say, wat did u do then?, really then wat happened? etc. After awhile it was like we wer best friends. Dean is a great motivator. I'm listening. Rando1

You have a way of KISS...another great blog!!

I agree with rick888 and reinvestor42 in that, you have 2 ears and 1 mouth in order to listen twice as much as you talk.

Often times you notice people trying to finish sentences for others and not letting them complete what they have to say. This usually backfires and makes the other person frustrated; compromising the conversation.

You are SO right...people will talk if you let them; so, let them!!

Thanks again,
John

Hey Dean,

Thanks once again for your words of wisdom. It sounds so simple! I will remember this and definitely put it to use.

Warm regards
Angie

I for one need to stop and listen more. Thanks for that, Dean.

Steve and Veronica? You's are gonna be here in AZ this week? Awe, man, I wanna come! I'll just sit and listen, I promise! lol J/K But, it sure would be nice to just be near some of you successful people and absorb as much knowledge and confidence and good vibes as I possibly can. K, well, have a great time. It's a really fine time to be in AZ at this time of the year because it's not AS HOT as usual, and it's not rainy or cold yet. Perfect timing!

2 ears 1 mouth
Use accordingly.

Just heard something similar this weekend during different church services. Thank you for all you do. WIll be getting back soon with a report of a first call and/or deal.

Blessings for a good week.

Thanks Dean for the good encouraging words. I think we lost an agent, he expected us to make offers after seeing a couple of houses, and since we feel insecure,and the houses were not the right ones, he is not responding, we are looking for a new agent. This first deal is taking forever!!
Anyway, your blog is always great and inspiring.

Dean,

As always, your blog is pure gold. My Dad always used to say, let that hole under your nose heal a little and shut up and listen. What an essential skill effective listening is, and how much most of us have to learn to be good at it!

Thank you, your blog is wonderful, as always.

Monte

great blog, dean. i AM one of those people who has to know EVERYTHING about what i'm doing or saying, so i will practice this technique! thanks for the tip!

As always your advice is right on target.Since we are basically problem solvers it's very important to listen first so you can comprehend the steps necessary to give them the best possible option(s)
for their situation.Also if I might add another suggestion to this subject we also have 2 eyes and
it can be equally important to observe while you listen.A lot of important insight can be gained through non verbal communication especially from people in distressed situations.

As always thank you for all your positive inspiration and help.

Keep the Faith,
Robin R.Knight

I'm listening! Found this to be very true, especially with teenagers. However, great in business, as well. Your the best.

ZepInvest

No one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care...

Listening, really listening,,, to people will give you the path to successful relationships and actions...

Hey Dean, what I think was cool in your morning Blog was the fact that you have started doing some Yoga. We want to keep our Fearless Leader going strong and not much on this earth will continue to strengthen your mind like Yoga. I've been doing it since 1972, that's 39 years. Meditation also, pretty advanced stuff... stick with it and starting it now at your younger age makes all the difference when your my age at 61. Keep it up and when you're older one day it will hit you, how you feel physically and mentally compared to those who are also aging around you. That's when you REALLY KNOW the difference in your Energy and Clarity of Mind. So for all the neat encouraement I get from your Blogs, Coaches and other DG Family Members, it's a good feeling to be able to encourage right back on something... stay the course of Health and Yoga. Enjoy!

Great Monday of Wisdom by the way! And yeah, I've got to say it too, your son is great to see on these Blogs! So when do we get to meet your wife on this Blogg? Tell her a student wants to see the real genus behind the man! hahaha

Great words of wisdom and something that we should know or be reminded of again and again. Thank you DG!!

Great words of wisdom Dean! This is so true in business and in life.

If you don't know what to say when you meet a VIP just listen and feed back what they have said.

Great words of wisdom Dean! This is so true in business and in life.

If you don't know what to say when you meet a VIP just listen and feed back what they have said.

Thanks again Dean,

Just that little simple thing that can get us so much more. Move us to the next deal, next assignment, next flip, next property.

I agree and resonate with your wise message of today!

Our creator is most wise and he created us with two ears and only one mouth! This must be so that we listen more and speak less for in listening more there is true wisdom therefore let us become wise - listen up!

I have read that in negotiations the winner is he who listens!

Thanks you for sharing Dean!

Thanks, Dean. I tend to try to outguess what people are going to say and talk over them. You are right, being quiet is the deal. This tendency made me a little worried about my actions about talking to real estate buyers, etc.

I heard that a good listener is a virture. I was practicing what to say because I did think that they may slip something on me that trips me. I have got to relax. Again thanks Dean.

TeraT(Kat)

I just watched this after posting about my experience of finally making the phone calls to the REA's this morning, and what Dean says is so true. My confidence is really high right now, especially because I kept quiot when I was suppose to and the Agents were more than willing to share their thoughts and ideas with me.
I really do appreciate the service you provide for us Dean and team.

understand. Yes, the reason God gave us 1 mouth and 2 ears for a reason...listen twice as much as you talk. People love to talk about them selves so just give them a chance! Thats where the information starts. And, knowledge is a funny thing. People understand what they know, but but very few "know" what they "dont know". Make sure you know the difference!! Think about this and dont try to BS, cause if you do, that is what comes out and the dumbest person knows it. "The dumbest people I know are the ones that THINK they know everything.

We are constantly closing deals...for houses, with buyers, agents and on an on. So when you get to the end of a session, and you ask a very simple question like "what do you think". SHUT UP....the first person that speaks loses!!

Thanks again Dean and good luck to everyone.

You just added another great tip. Keeping to the basics just listen and don't talk so much.
Love It!!!!